Tag Archives: iguanas

October 2: 7 Years

2 Oct

Although this weekend started out pretty rough, it seemed to end on a better note.  There were a lot of tears this time.  I wonder if it’s going to keep getting harder.  I had assumed it would get easier, and it was for a while.  I think the worst part is that there isn’t anything that can be done right now.  No one can make this easier, no one can make this hurt less.  I’m developing this deep anger at body that, for once, doesn’t stem from a physical trait.  I feel incompetent, useless, broken.  I feel like there’s something wrong with me.  Like anything else that isn’t performing the way it should, the way it was made to, things feel very wrong.

I’ve wondered a lot lately about never having kids.  A lot of people don’t.  We originally weren’t having any.  We’ve been talking about greyhounds.  And an iguana.  But then what?  I suppose we have endless possibilities.  Fostering, adopting, dying all alone… to name a few.  No positive enough?  Too bad.

We saw a couple movies this weekend.   Abduction with Taylor Lautner (No, there are no werewolves.  Dissapointed?  Me too. 😉 ) and 50/50 with Joseph Gordon-Levitt and Seth Rogan.  50/50 is the big winner.  Jeremy and I both agreed that it was a GOOD movie.  We don’t often agree on things like that.  I laughed, I cried (real shocker, right?), and then I laughed some more.

I did some sewing.  I slept a lot.  Laundry.  I cuddled with Bella.  And Alice.  I know, crazy weekend.

I suppose on one happy note, Jeremy and I started dating 7 years ago today.  Here’s a picture from a few days later.  It was our Junior Homecoming, we were 16-years-old:

Aww, look how clueless we were... 😉

We really liked each other.  Cute and smart?  –>Winning.  We fought a lot.  We went through a lot.  But 7 years later, he’s still my very best friend, the best husband I could ever hope for, and the best man that I know.  Despite everything we’re dealing with right now, I’m still a very lucky girl.

Advertisements